Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Facebook or No Facebook?

Ah, yes. Back to the Facebook topic... I have been struggling, lately, with the whole Facebook concept. Unfortunately, everyone in the entire universe is on it, except for me, and I feel like I miss out on a lot of things. Like my favorite doc, Dr. Drew, and my favorite author, Jodi Picoult, and my favorite radio show, Elvis Duran and the Morning Show. I could be enjoying a number of things on Facebook, were it only that simple. And my blog would probably have more of a chance for success, too, if it posted to Facebook. Do I miss keeping up with family and friends on Facebook? Mmmmmm, sort of. If I'm being honest, though, not as much as I should. The constant updates are actually a little overwhelming, and it has been peaceful not to be addicted to the social monster.

Truly, it has been an eye opener for me how crazy our world has become with Facebook and texting and the wonderful world of technology in general. And before I go any farther, let me just say that I was one of the worst Facebookers ever, always bragging on my "perfect" children, our "wonderful" life and all the "amazing" adventures we had the good fortune to partake in... Now that I've had some distance from the demon, I can see that I was one of those Facebookers that drive other Facebookers crazy. The only excuse I have is that I was caught up in the maelstrom of the experience. It is like a second reality people live through, and the best thing I ever did for myself and my family was to get off of it. It might be argued my blog is akin to Facebook, and there is some truth to that. I do tend to brag on my beautiful babies and handsome husband, but then again, that is the point of the blog - to document our life. And that is what blogs are for, in a way, don't you think? A forum for people to proclaim the richness of their lives.

So you can see the dilemma I have, here... I need Facebook, but I don't want to be on Facebook. I don't want the drama that comes with it, because it has been blessedly peaceful without it. I was reminded of this just the other day, when I saw one of my dear friends using it... She had been experiencing a somewhat harrowing event, and she shared with me some posts from Facebook about it, which were on her cell phone - drama elevator number one. And while we were talking about it, another person came up to her with a tidbit about said harrowing event, and immediately after this person left, my friend was texting another person - drama elevator number two. It made me sad, because back in the old days, it wouldn't have been possible to do that. And I really feel like it was unhealthy and just kept the drama rolling, whereas if there wasn't instant access to social networks, the situation would have the opportunity to die down, both as a situation in itself and also in my friend's mind and heart.

Yah, texting and cell phones are right up there on my Things I Hate list, right under Facebook. I despise talking on the phone and I do not text. For one thing, I don't want to waste the money on it, and for another I don't want to spend all my time texting. It truly blows my mind when I think about the money people spend on their phones and phone plans, not to mention the time they spend on the bloody devices. I'm far too cheap to be able to justify the expense. I have a basic cell phone I only use when I have to. One of my biggest fears is the day my children are old enough to have their own phones... YIKES!

So what should I do? I could create a family Facebook profile for the purpose of my blog only and to follow the superstars I admire. But I know it will be temptation at it's worst, and I'm not sure if I'm strong enough to handle it. I feel like it is a real addiction, similar to someone addicted to drugs or alcohol, and unless I enforce abstinence, then I am going to be sucked into the whirlwind of drama. See? Scary stuff. I need it, but I'm not sure if I need it badly enough to risk the peaceful state of mind I've developed. Any thoughts?


  1. That's so crazy, because just today I thought about asking if you are on Facebook to "befriend". I guess I got my answer!

    I waited a long time before I got my account - and in fact logged on to John's for awhile in order to connect with the college students we have a ministry with. However, eventually, after having intimate "Facebook online chats" with them under John's just seemed wrong to not make it clear that it was me talking and not John.

    My biggest reason for wanting to avoid was one person in particular. She was one of my best friends in high school and led me down a path I don't want to repeat. She was manipulative and I was enabling - and I have no desire to have her keep up on my life or vice versa. When I found out she could be absolutely blocked from seeing any sign of my existence on Facebook from the start, I finally agreed.

    For me, it's been a much better experience than I thought it'd be, but I think that's largely because of the connections it allows for with all of our college friends - how I can make "baby steps" of communication with them and encourage friendships - as well as associate names and faces with little tidbit happenings of their lives. It's been just enough of what I need with the casual relationships in my life. However, I certainly see the issues you are concerned with. I try to keep my "gushing" to my blog, but every now and then, do enjoy putting up pictures of our adventures as they do define what makes me "me".

    If you decide to pursue Facebook, please "befriend" me - however, now that I've found your blog, it's fun keeping up with you and your family this way. =)

  2. well you know my thoughts - I am one of the few not on Facebook, but never started it so I don't know the addiction... but I just don't want to find those people that I have lost and don't want them to find me... BUT i can see now with you wanting to expand and have your blog reach others - and learn about other opportunities - maybe you should have a 'professional profile' that will redirect others to your blog if you choose? can you set it so not all have access to see your blog link? maybe you could have both? i don't know!!?


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